Sunday, August 31, 2008

Washing Whites

I was just doing a whole bucket full of laundry in the basement and had a memory return.

It was the first time I went to Brooklyn to visit Asher after we met. I was there for five days, I think, and one of the days, I think it was Sunday, he had to do laundry. He had asked me, "I'm going to do laundry, do you want to go with me?" I said, "Do you want me to go with you?" He got mad at me for this and was like, "Yo! I just asked you. Either you do or you don't, simple question." We were getting used to each other and the me who was sassy and full of attitude was crushing under this new thing I felt for him. So finally I said, "Okay". I remember the walk to the laundromat and exactly what I was wearing (DKNY jeans and a purple t-shirt) and we walked out on his front stoop and he introduced me to a friend who gave him a fist pound.

So I went with him and decided I would throw in some clothes in with his wash. He refused, refused to wash my panties with his clothes. He said it wasn't right but I could throw my shirts in with his. I said it wasn't right to pay $75 more cents to wash three pairs of panties alone, that he was being ridiculous. He claimed his mother didn't raise him that way. I laid down the law and said, "I'm sorry but you will have to deal with it" and threw my panties in with his load. We watched them mix in and turn in circles over and over again. And that was that. Apparently when we willed my opinionated self to come back, it came back fierce.

Edit****I just realized it was this very same Labor Day weekend, exactly two years later. I am happy to report our unmentionables are cohabitating nicely in the washing machine right now.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Woodland Shower

Last weekend was my Dev's baby shower, it turned out so well and the mama was very appreciative. Yesterday was she and B's 4 year wedding anniversary. They will have a new baby within the next month and we expect he will completely change their lives.

Baby Ewing, here are some pictures of the party I threw you.*

*With a trunkload of help from Heidi (Dev's good friend).

While I am on the subject of money

We just received a generous monetary gift from an old family friend and we don't know what we are going to do with it. When the wedding money comes in, there is so much weight to it. You feel an obligation to spend it on something that will signify the beginning of your lives. First thought....a fancy paper cutter (Asher calls it a guillotine, which I love). Second thought, another set of our flatware. We have 6 sets so far and it is so lovely, I don't mind accumulating slowly and bustin' suds often.

We also got a big gift card to Target from my mama's cousin. I tried to keep this one a secret but when I checked the balance online, I accidently left it there and Asher found it.

And last Tuesday night, we attended a timeshare presentation and received a $50 American Express gift card and a three night stay at a resort nearby. All for being tempted focus our lives around vacations (as if we weren't trying that trick already).

We haven't decided what to do with all this yet so right now we are feeling loaded.

When it gets tough...follow our lead

It is no secret that Asher and I are having a hard time with our money situation. I make a good salary and he is doing art full time but it doesn't add up after the bills are paid. In addition to us loving each other and desiring to be together, it was also helpful to get married so he can attain a green card (he doesn't have a US work permit). It is a hardship I could talk endlessly about since it means I don't get to buy shoes, purses, clothes or anything other than necessities with my paycheck. But since those are all material items, when I go home at night, I don't feel like I am missing too much. My feet are in desperate need of a pedicure but I can shove them into some sneakers and no one even knows.

I say all of this, hesitantly because there is a touch of shame in going without, in being broke. But I want to get to the honesty of what I have learned in this relationship. Love breeds confidence and makes you think that you can do things you only imagined. I am taking chances with my wedding coordinating business and with the new etsy shop and it is coming together and it is slowly working (holding breath).

Together, we decided that we would focus on what we love, creating art. We gather around the table and the kitties come to watch and it is just like when we eat there, we are nourished. We decided to do this etsy site together ( Last night we brainstormed and soon the site will have a fancy banner that reflects my handmade craftiness and Asher's urban graffiti aesthetic and hopefully all this love will begin to help with the bills.

We don't ask for a lot because we already know that we have exactly what we need.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Love + Art + My Etsy Shop

I posted two listings on my very own, brand new, etsy site.

It was named Love + Art because my wedding company is Love + Marriage and because ever since I started writing to a pen pal when I was 18, I always closed off my letters with a ...Love + "Something Clever". So I'm starting a full service company of Love + Anything That I Feel Like. So far it is a couple different projects I like to think sort of relate to each other (marriage and art). Asher can't wait for Love + Waffles even though I am not well known for my waffles...yet.

Take it easy on me. I just wanted to get something up so I haven't refined my selling "voice" or policies. I hope to make it really dynamic with a lot of different types of art available. I wanted to have things in all price points. We'll see if I start making cards at $10 a pop and feel like I ripped myself off. I can't imagine charging more because I personally wouldn't pay more. I just know I tend to underestimate the time and effort involved. But it is, after all, a labor of love.

I hope I get a ton of business and can have my own company (companies) and quit working for someone else. Dream big? Yeah, pretty much.

Spread the word....Love+Art (LovePlusArt) was born today.

Love + crafty hands,

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

A Reinvention

I am a total homebody, I admit it. I will look forward to something for weeks and then when the time comes, I chicken out (socially) and end up occupying myself at home. The time slips by and I am guilty every minute of it. To make things worse I married someone just like myself except he doesn't get the guilty part.

This has happened recently on the Fourth of July. I was so honestly so excited about a friend's party. As it was getting closer, I kept finding out that people I knew wouldn't be there. This is silly because I could go and have a perfectly good time. Instead, we cat-sat at my sister's house and watched a marathon of To Catch a Predator. Pathetic. We didn't even go to my parent's house to watch the fireworks over the lake, and we were housesitting there too!

I wanted to start a business but I have trouble answering my phone when it rings. I am entirely too content in my little bubble and the interruption is.....irritating.

I am going to try to reinvent myself as a social butterfly. I don't think it has gotten to unhealthy levels yet so there is still hope.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

My Thursday Morning Visitor

This little snippet just came back to me. It was one of those moments where I kind of felt like I didn't know who I was. Like, "Oh, this is the girl that I have become."

I was at work on Thursday. I had left that morning on weird terms with Asher because money is tight, the situation is hard. Knowing there isn't much we can do about it is even more difficult. I leave in my morning rush with just a quick peck.

I get a call at about 9:45, sitting at my desk. It is our CFO and he says, "there is someone here, I think you will know." So I walk downstairs and when I hit the hallway I smell him already. He doesn't wear too much cologne but it smells so good and it stays in the air and I know he is there. He is hiding around the corner like he did the first time I came to visit him in NY. That night, two years ago, I came off the plane and I was worried I wouldn't recognize him but I found him right away hiding from me behind a vending machine.

He had ridden the bus and then his skateboard to come see me at work, to bring me my phone which I had left behind. And he smelled and looked so good. I took him around to meet the people in the office and he was putting on jokes and messing around and charming everyone. They thought he was cute and younger than he looks in the picture by my desk. And one gal said, "he is so handsome and his smile is so sweet." I just felt really proud that he is my husband.

I always thought I would miss this part of life. My relationships before were so difficult and I thought that to be with someone you had to get that sick feeling in your stomach when they were away from you. I thought that intensity meant love but it was distrust. I was accustomed to a certain mania in trying to make things work, obsessed with making things look presentable to people even when it was me trying to glue scraps of happiness into a pretty picture.

This is not a scrap or a maniacal need or any intense feeling in my stomach. This is a man, being a man. A person who chose, of his free will, to spend life with me. It feels safe and calm and happy and filled with faith and trust. Thank goodness this is me, finally.

Friday, August 15, 2008

This weekend - Going to Grandma's

My parents bought my grandma's house when she died because otherwise they would lose the connection to the town they grew up in. It is in a town of maybe 300 people called Endicott. Just a small farm town with hot nothing to do. Except, this particular little town, holds mythical stature in my mind.

My dad's dad was the country doctor, treating patients in exchange for goods if they couldn't pay. My mom's dad, was a farmer whose cows ran to greet him when they heard his car approaching. Dad's mom had a big, lovely house with hidden rooms, lots of costume jewelry and she blended up orange juice with ice into frothy goodness . Mom's mom sat in the kitchen and drank coffee, smoking cigarettes with the ladies and she is the one I got my middle name from. Her peonies still grow because Mom and Dad tend to them, they even got the recent Yard of the Month award.

There are memories in every house, in the park, the main street, the doctor's office and with the few people left. Even if they aren't all my own memories, after years of stories, it feels like it. So you see, we couldn't leave that little town.

The house has A/C and tons of raspberries bushes in the yard and I get to swim in the huge pool where my mom set swim records when she was in high school. Mike Phelps, meet Rhonda Kay. I will work on the rest of the prep for Dev's baby shower next weekend and read tons of magazines in the hot sun. Asher can practice driving on the farm roads or just skate down the empty streets in town. Maybe we can explore some scary abandoned house on the side of the road. Who knows?

Asher doesn’t really want to go but I’m making him because it will feel like a real vacation! I think maybe I need to sell it to him a little better because I think anyone who read that whole part up there would want to go. It is a perfect escape.

Weekends in August Part 2 - Asher's Art Show

Asher was part of an urban art gallery show called "Spray it, Don't Say it." It included many different artists including some locals, a well know street artist from Paris, Jeff Aerosol, and a girl from Brooklyn who actually knew AV. She was going to fly with him to our wedding because he was scared to fly. The world just gets smaller. Plus, the artist who curated the show, Kim aka Soule, was really awesome, as was her boyfriend, and Asher will make fun when I say I want us to be friends with them.

It was a warm day except it rained while the artists were all doing live painting. Asher kept it up until the airbrush started reacting to the wetness in the air. Dev and B came and we went and had an ice cream/gelato break. B had more cider and sampled the keg.

Asher sold some prints so we were excited to go out to dinner and then Dan treated us to dinner with he and his girl, Laura. I am so excited by the exposure Asher is getting. He was interviewed for a documentary and even though I was eavesdropping and wanted to answer all the questions for him, I think he did a good job reppin' himself.

Weekends in August Part 1 - Olympia

The first weekend in August, Dev, B, Asher and I took a trip down to Olympia to spend time with Toby and Olivia. Tob is my oldest friend. I am bad at holding on to friends when I move or change or whatever and somehow with Tob, we always reconnect and still fit. It is mostly because he is a constant joke cracker and my laughtrack is always cue'd up. A year ago he married the girl most perfect for him and they made the cutest house together. She used to be vegan and was slaving away almost all day making the most deliciously vegetarian food, candied walnuts for the salad, fish and even pork chops for the meat-a-holics. What a gem. B talked us all into drinking cider and tequila with limeade (my favorite) and Dev let me feel her belly a lot and got to snuggle with the anti-social Towns while B attempted to love up the chompy/frisky old lady cat. It was a really wonderful weekend. Bonus, at one point Asher was rubbing my feet and Toby and I were talking and he was like..."I always knew you'd marry a really cool guy." I know, right?

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Indian Food...Strangely Easy

This doesn't really warrant its own post but....
Tasty Bite makes Indian food that you can boil in the stove in a pot of hot water (they spell tasty right, unlike my arch enemy you know who you are). When you pour it out, it is sometimes very good, sometimes OK. Never bad. It is vegetarian with lots of veggies or lentils, even cashews. Sometimes it is soupy and when I pour it on the plate I have to build rice walls to block the flavors from running into each other. We have tried a bunch of different flavors because the organic market carries a huge variety. We've had this two nights this week and because we had two flavors each time, it turned out to be a $5 meal, total, for both of us. And Big Boy was totally begging for some too, obviously feeling back to normal.

Graffiti Nonsense

Here are some spray cans Asher painted. The cans are empty. Where their contents went, I cannot reveal. The cans now function as art by themselves. They still have the rattle in there so they sound and look really cool.

And last week we received a mysterious package from Ness and she had sent Asher a Fatcap boy from Kid Robot. I assure you that Asher was overjoyed to receive this and overly defensive when I claimed it was for me. We didn't know because Ness addresses the package to herself! Inside, it also had a yummy vegetarian cookbook. Nice lil' Ness.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Art for a cause

There is an art competition for political art to be hung at the Democratic National Convention. It is sponsored by Obey and Upper Playground, two of my favorite art/political brands. Seriously, I hope that Asher and I contribute something to this because now is the time for making a political statement. It is so important that we don't let the old cronies keep running our country into the sewers.

Plus, there is a local art show. The crew at Bherd studios is calling for political art. I love the idea of contributing locally too. Time to get to work! The kind of "work" we love.

I want to do a cut 'n paste of el Comandante Marcos. He is a hero of mine for working on behalf of the people in Chiapas, Mexico. I always feel myslef supporting the underdog, people who are opressed by big governments, corporations, and economic racism/culturalism. I think this is what I will work on for the local show. He also looks so cool with his face covered by a mask, smoking a pipe, riding a horse, with those bullet belts crossing his chests. It's enough to make a politically-minded girl swoon.

Trusting my maternal instincts

Last week when I wrote about Big Boy sleeping too much, he was most certainly communicating to me. I didn't know the full extent until Monday when I came home from work and held his limp body in my arms. He was so lethargic and couldn't even jump up or down from the couch. This was trouble.

I called the vet and they advised me to take him to the emergency vet where it is $90 just for them to see him. We would rather spend good money on care, not the evaluation so we decided to try to wait it out til morning. Asher slept with one eye open next to Big on the couch. Moxie slept by my side, keeping me company in the big bed.

In the morning, we took him in and he had a fever and a bacteria infection. He is on antibiotics now and feeling almost complete. Asher say "well, he is back to his annoying ways." Bigs loves to lay on Asher's drawings as witnessed by this pic. Asher loves to complain about him.

And, while Big has lost 3 pounds in the last year, it looks like Mox has gained some. She might not live up to her "Little" nickname much longer. It's hard for us girls.

A Woodland Welcome for Baby Ewing

Yeah! The invites are out and the guest of honor has received hers so I get to post on the cutest cut 'n paste project I have worked on to date. I have to also reveal that I roped the mister into helping me with this one too. Look at that grass? And the raccoon and the owl? That's all Asher. I might have to relinquish my title to the King. I appreciated the help and when they were completed, my little sissy loved them!
Well hello accomplishment, you feel good.

Friday, August 1, 2008

The one that is the smallest, that I love the most

I am so excited to post some crafty stuff I have been doing for the upcoming baby shower of my baby sister. For some reason, I'm not quit sure, I have been super inspired by the theme. I just want to be creating all day long. Last night I roped my honeybunches into helping me. He is crafty too! Maybe is is post-wedding energy? Nesting instinct? Baby yearning? Whatever, here is a sneak peak because it is all I can stand. Otherwise, I will blurt it out all over this darn blog.